Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Randomize