This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize