whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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