I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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