Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
did i just pee glitter
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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