I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP