I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
