I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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