Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
PANTIES FOUND
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