There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize