he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
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The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
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Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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