Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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