Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
