We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
