so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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