We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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