she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize