omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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