what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
