mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
