Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I just snuked. Sneezed and puked

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(734): View more from Michigan

Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.

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(219): View more from Indiana

you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.

(949): View more from California

she's my drunk super hero.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(214): View more from Texas

New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.

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(256): View more from Alabama

just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level

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(317): View more from Indiana

i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard

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(860): View more from Connecticut

You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.

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