I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Non-Jews are for practice
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
