I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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