who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
