When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
