And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
