I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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