Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
My butt remains clenched, sir.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
