You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
so let's talk penis.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
