It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I just cut my nipple shaving
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I broke a rule
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.