would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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