I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
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