I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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