but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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