what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
COCAINE IS GR8
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
