After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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