Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize