If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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