we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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