So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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