You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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