We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
