Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
