Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
