I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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