I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
