i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
