what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
