I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
