Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
